Mis à jour : 30 août 2020
Epigenetics and cellular memory.
The very young branch of genetics called epigenetics has shown that traumas linked to abuse, starvation or war leave traces in DNA. It says that with identical genetic heritage, two twins can evolve differently depending on their respective environments. Individuals, and consequently their genes, are in fact subject to many environmental factors: diet, diseases, drugs and toxins, stress, place and lifestyle, which can modify both their cells and their DNA.
These findings explain many of the usual results obtained during the emotional liberation process of "Family Constellations".
However, it remains challenging to understand how memories can be passed down beyond 7 generations, not only through DNA but also through behaviour. To illustrate this, I have a curious story to tell you. But, first, let me set the context.
The impact on the collective unconscious of the wars of religion.
As you know, the War of Religions have left deep traces in the collective unconscious, and that until today. Thus, there is the inescapable massacre of Saint-Barthélemy, the horrors of the Inquisition or the witch hunt. As a result of these persecutions, entire populations emigrated to more tolerant countries. It is evident that having to flee and leave everything for good in order to be able to live in peace is enormous stress that may have left indelible traces in the DNA of these populations.
As a reminder, the stress level linked to the death of a spouse is 100, separation is 60, and a change in status is evaluated at 50/100. You can easily relate this data to the stress of having to leave everything to save your own skin and move to another country where very often another language is spoken, and other customs and traditions are practised.
Usually, we talk about the massacre of Protestants by Catholics. Still, there have also been massacres carried out by Protestants against Catholics like the one in Nîmes in 1563, which is less well known.
Linda and the eldest son sacrificed.
The story I am about to tell you is that of Linda, a mom of three who came to a constellation day that I facilitated just outside Monmouth in Wales.
Linda sat next to me and began telling me about her children who couldn't find their place in their adult lives and her oldest child who couldn't form a romantic relationship.
I asked her a few questions, and she told me that her father was Swiss, that he had fled the seminary following an event that he has always kept secret and had taken refuge in England when he was in his twenties. His parents living in a small mountain village in German-speaking Switzerland had experienced his flight as a humiliation and had to leave their village out of shame and rejection of the village community. A few years later, her father married Linda's mother, a Protestant, which her parents considered as yet another betrayal. As I ask a few more questions, I discovered that his father had been forced to become a priest instead of his older brother, who had a disability.
We started the constellation by placing one representative for Linda's father, one representative for Linda, and another representative for the father's older brother. After a few minutes, where the tension was palpable, everyone was in apnea, and it appeared that a person was missing whom I chose to represent by a person lying on the ground. Immediately, the field began to breathe. It is then that I asked, why it was the elder brother who should have been the priest and there Linda answered me that since always in the family, the eldest boy had to be consecrated to the Church. I asked why, but Linda was unable to tell me.
The Unknown Soldier.
Then comes this name of the unknown soldier. The Unknown Soldier is a man who could not be buried by his family. His family, unable to recognize the body, could not really realize he was dead. This inability to touch the body of the deceased will have an impact on the grieving process, which is impossible to do. To cope with this, some families will dedicate one of their children to God to somehow accompany the deceased.
Dedicating a child to pay a debt, thank for a grace, or honor a deceased.
In this family, it was several generations that the eldest son had to dedicate himself to the priesthood. After several hundred years, no one knew why the Elder was to be sacrificed to God, but loyalty to the Unknown Soldier was still active..
Dedicating a child to pay a debt, thank for a grace, or honour a deceased.
In this family, it has been several generations that the eldest son has to dedicate himself to the priesthood. After several hundred years, no one knew why the Elder was to be sacrificed to God, but the loyalty to the Unknown Soldier was still active. We can characterize this type of loyalty as toxic, because it has lost its meaning and it traps people in behaviours they no longer understand and which prevent them from living their lives freely, just like Linda's eldest son who is unable to create a romantic relationship, stuck by the family ban.
So why did I link this Unknown Soldier to the war between Protestants and Catholics? Speaking about religion with Linda, I immediately noticed the level of nervousness in her body, and in her face. After a few minutes, she told me that she was Catholic, but that her husband was also Protestant and that there was a lot of tension and disagreement with her husband over matters related to religion, and that their children were also Protestants.
The representative was also in tune with the one he represented.
When you represent in a constellation, there is no such thing as chance. The representative of the unknown soldier told us, after the constellation, that he was an atheist, but from a Protestant family and that by doing research he had discovered that his ancestors had fled England to take refuge in Alsace. Amazing isn't it?
After a while, I suggest another person lie down next to the Unknown Soldier. This was the person who killed the Unknown Soldier. Since then, unwittingly, he has joined the family of the one who took his life. Indeed, when blood is spilt and a person is killed, that person automatically belongs to the family of the person who took their life and vice versa.
Imagine that in your family there are also individuals who have been killed and that their victims are part of it, or who have killed and who belong to other families. During the last two world wars, our grandfathers or great grandfathers fought and had to kill men or women. They are now part of your family, and some of them have joined the families of their victims.
When blood is shed, the murdered person becomes a member of our family.
When the Unknown Soldier was able to look at the person lying next to him who had taken his life, Linda's representative completely relaxed, colours came to her cheeks, and her breathing was much easier.
I asked each representative to bow to the painful fate of the Unknown Soldier and his assassin, and then turn to look to the future. I also unwound a rope to separate the world of the living and the dead. It was then that the constellation ended.
Families who dedicate a child to God generally do so to either atone for a fault, to thank for a grace received or to honour a deceased who could not have been normally. It happens that in some cases, the tradition continues without knowing why and for whom this sacrifice is practised in each generation. The cost can be heavy and create intricacies that freeze the family in a past that no longer exists.
Family Constellations break these unconscious loyalties and free members from prophecies, prohibitions, expiations, and debts that are no longer necessary.
If you too, like Linda, feel that you or your family are stuck in transgenerational entanglements and are looking for a solution to regain freedom and peace, do not hesitate to send me your question, or a request for a discovery session. Address your email to firstname.lastname@example.org.